Wednesday, March 25, 2015

More Toileting Tips

A mother writes:
My son is 9 years old. He will do all the bathroom steps (may need prompting at times) but doesn't void in the toilet. We have him in pull-ups. Has Philip communicated his thoughts to you about using the toilet, like what might have been the thing or things that made this challenging? Thanks, S

To S,
Toileting academics help in searching the mind to make connections on how my body functions and how I can gain control over my body. He should learn about the body in an academic way, explaining the blood, kidneys, and bladder. The challenge is I could not feel when I had to go.  I still can't feel it well but I am able to guess and I can relax my bladder when I go.

The toilet makes a loud sound. I used to be defensive of going but now I’m not. Have him flush only if he wants.

(The following is a repost from before, but I wanted to include it here for new readers.)

Hi Philip!
I have an 8 YO son with autism too. His name is E. E is non-verbal. And he is still not able to communicate. You inspire me to encourage him to communicate with me. Btw, are you half Filipino? I am just starting to read your blog and could not find the answer yet. But I am so excited about the things that I can learn from you. A bunch of Thank you’s for having this blog. You renewed my passion to help E communicate and all the Autism kids. Here is my question for now.
E is not potty trained yet; do you have any advice how he can learn to do it? Again, thank you.

Renton, WA

To EM,
I am half Filipino and half Mexican-American. I mean to tell you some toilet training tips. To make E try to use the bathroom, treat him like his age. I could not stand being treated like a toddler and made to pee for prizes. I did not want attention on me when I used the toilet. My mom used to do a potty song. I hated it because everyone knew I was in the bathroom. No person could train me. I did not want to be like an animal to train. Peace made a giant improvement in my toilet training. Learning going to the toilet happened for me when I was 9. Mom had started RPM lessons. She taught me about the body and how it works. I felt respected as smart and my parents loved me. I really made up my own mind to go on my own. I am the same Philip before and after communication, but I can meet my heard goals now. I wish E and you the best.



  1. Thank you so much for posting this! I was just wondering about this for my autistic son who is 3 1/2 years old. I'm not expecting him to begin using the toilet for some time yet, since he is not interested. But, I wanted to make sure I was as respectful as possible and knew the best ways to continue introducing the idea and routine. This makes so much sense for my son, he communicates somewhat non-verbally and we know that he understands so much more than he can express or confirm! Much love and peace to you and your family <3

  2. You write that going to the bathroom makes much noise. I wonder if it would help (anyone with autusm or worries about noises) to sit on the toilet rather than stand and to put some toilet paper in the bowl before you sit down. It should lessen the noise; it's also really much more hygienic.