Monday, June 8, 2015

Why I Can Type But Not Talk

Philip answers a Classmate's question.


Classmate's question:  How can you write all of that down, but can’t read it out loud or talk?

From Philip:
Talking is not the same as thinking.  I am able to write my thoughts because pointing is much easier for me to do than talking. You can talk without thinking very hard. It seems so easy for you. I think talking is so hard. It is a major struggle to move my lips and tongue to make the words I want to say come out. I want to be able to say what I think but what come out are usually stim words like "potty" or requests for food. These put me in a place of people thinking I am only capable of simple thought. No life is complete without thoughts of people, feelings, and love. People often think autistics are incapable of relationships, love, and empathy. That is furthest from the truth. People like me also want friends. But I am not able to join in easily because I can't talk. I wish I could. Language is no problem for me. That’s why I can write well. People need to know that autism is pretty hard to live with. It separates me from others by making my communication difficult. But if you can be patient with me and put me in your lives, I can be happy living with autism. People make my life meaningful. 

Philip's submission for the Autistic Self Advocacy Network (ASAN)
Autism Acceptance Month last April.

"i like being autistic because i am more in tune to things people don't usually notice. i am smart and observant. i like leaving people amazed when i talk to them on my ipad and they weren't expecting me to know so much. i like spelling my thoughts because my words people can see. i like being moved by music and lines of poetry. i like appreciating nature. i like beauty in God's creation. i love worshipping God in my spirit. i love that God gives all people worth. my life as autistic is meaningful." 

15 comments:

  1. What do you mean with stim words? When you say this words do you really want to or not? And do they help you?

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    1. stim words are words my mouth says automatically. i do not usually mean to say these words. they often come out when i am stressed. they sometimes help. but sometimes not. i am trying to cope with stress in productive ways instead like praying. -Philip

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    2. Thank you Philip! ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

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    3. Stay the course Lisa, I've been down your road and it's a journey, not a destination.

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    4. Thanks! I need the reminder, especially when big challenges come up...and they do a lot. I appreciate my fellow travelers very much.

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  2. This is freaking Awesome! Thank you God for allowing this boy to communicate! I knew there was something to it. My son is three and half and on the spectrum. He spells words out with wooden letters! I get so excited to see what he will spell. Today he spelled horse and said it. God bless all the boys and girls with autism and their parents. Lord help us to understand our children. Thank you so much for sharing your story. Much LOVE to you all!

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    1. Thank you Holly! YES, there is true intelligence in our kids. They have so much to offer but we often miss it if we don't make the effort to see things their way. We need to expand our neurotypical way of looking at things! Continue to harness your son's strengths. He is an excellent candidate for RPM, should you need to find him an alternative way to communicate. Much love to you and your son as well!

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    2. Thank you God, for creating intelligent, compassionate people who have developed alternate communication devices...

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    3. Yes, we are blessed to have these devices and the people who create and teach us to use them!

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  3. Philip continues to make my day with his words!

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    1. Thanks Kas! To know you are continually reading his words makes my day (and his).

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  4. I can talk about something I learned easily. So I could raise my hand and answer the teacher just fine. I can talk about ideas, like when they did current events in social studies. But when people are just chatting, I have to sort through what I should say and if it's a group others have already responded and the conversation about personal things, the things most people prefer to talk about, moves on while I listen and try to sort things out.

    Things are easier because 3 and a half years ago I found a safe game where very nice people were chatting in a live stream. I found I could respond to people faster when I was here at my keyboard. When we figured out the game would likely close my team were sad- and someone who didn't know computers well had been volunteered to start a Facebook group for us. I volunteered myself and got us started. I have told the ones I know well that I am learning from talking to them. Talking in person is still hard, but I have the words I have typed in similar conversations, the words I have read, more readily available. So when I am talking to one or 2 people there is still the gap, but it is a bit easier.

    I'm not saying this to say that we need to learn to talk as easily as we type. I can talk to Dad and Mom and the aunt who lives nearby easily. But outside of them the relative I interact with most is my cousin's wife, when I type out my responses to what she posts about their family. I think only having to sort out words and a picture or two may always be easier for me. But telling my people online (the ones I've known for years and and have shown they can be trusted) or even just writing it on the computer for myself something makes saying it to my close family easier and then I can say it to people I am trying to show I want to be friends with.

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  5. Philip, tell me more about how you worship God in your spirit. What is your relationship with God like?

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    1. Thanks for your question. Philip responded in a post today, July, 1, 2015.

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  6. Philip
    I am Asperger's, a type of autism, but I think you probably know what it is because your intelligence and your powers of observation overcomes anyone who does not have the same conditions as you.

    I have some theories that only someone with your observation skills can solve. I believe that the difference of us autistic, is in how we receive sensory stimuli.

    You could confirm me if you also have floating variations in sound, touch sight, taste, touch and smell. I have, they seem to move for me. How is it for you?

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