Lessons from Good Friday

I have been thinking a lot about Jesus’s sacrifice on the cross. He did not have to die for us. He is a king, the most High King. He could have ruled like an earthly king but he chose not to. Jesus chose the harder way. He made himself to bear our sins. He was condemned in our place. Now our sins are forgiven if we believe Jesus.  

I am following Jesus example by trying to live my life for others. I have a hard time being with people because of my autism. I cannot talk easily and I have poor body control. My anxiety is really hard to overcome. I get nervous almost every time I am outside my home. I can be easily startled by new experiences like being lost in a new place. It can be overwhelming. 

Jesus teaches me to be brave in facing my fears and anxieties. Jesus was resolute in completing his mission to save the world. He did not let his comfort, his friends, his critics, or his fears stop him. I have a mission too. It is to make disciples of all nations. It is the same mission of all believers. I can bring this message to my readers. I can be a voice for people like me. We need the hope of God's forgiveness and new life. 

I want to accomplish God’s mission for me like Jesus did. It may cost me my comfort and my energy but I gain God glory. Good Friday is a time to remember how Jesus loved us so much he gave his life for us. 

Copyright 2018 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.

Can Good Come from Autism?

I am aware that autism is not a diagnosis anyone wants to receive for their child. I am telling you that my chance to make the world a better place comes from being autistic.  God has called me to be different. Many people are chosen to be different to make the world have changes that make society progress. There are many ways we can progress. We make technological, artistic, social, and economic advances. Good comes from being able to see things in a new way that makes lives better.

My mom has learned to see autism differently. When I was younger I got yelled at often about things I could not control. People thought because I could not talk and I moved in repetitive ways I was lost in my own world with no thoughts or feelings. I paid attention to everything. I waited for my voice everyday. It would not come out of my mouth. It was buried in my mind where no one could see it but God. I got very good at talking to God.

God is with me and is always communicating with me. I make free my thoughts now because God has made a way for me to communicate without my mouth. I am now able to share this with you. I am pleased that people who are unable to speak can now find a way to communicate. This is the progress I can help bring to the world.

Copyright 2018 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.

Mexican Holiday

My Family in Mexico

This year we went back to Mexico. It was awesome. This time my sister Ana joined us. She is a senior at University of Michigan.  She was able to get away from her classes. She is going to medical school in the fall. I love when she is with us. Ana is fearless in so many ways. She always talks to everyone. She is capable of many things like going on missions trips, being a leader of globe med, and getting high grades. Ana is a great sister to me.

Ana and Me

Me and My Siblings

I am lucky to have an awesome family. My family is very close. My family has fun on vacation every year. Lolo and Lola make our family close and keep us together. They are most loving and kind. My Lola makes me feel so loved and respected. Lolo is so generous. 

Lolo and Lola

My Aunt Kit and Uncle Mike are both really cool. They make vacations organized and they make lots of friends. My cousins Tommy and Roger are very playful. They follow me around so I am never lonely.  

Uncle Mike, Aunt Kit, Tommy, and Roger

My brother Carlos is fun. He is always making jokes and funny faces. He played soccer and water polo. We celebrated Carlos’ 18th birthday there. The waiters sang to him. Lia is being snobbier but I still love her. Uncle Mike’s parents also came. They are so nice and understanding. Mom and Dad make sure I can do lots of things with everyone. They took us mini golfing and swimming at the big pool and the beach. I like swimming and going to the shows. My siblings played lots of games but it is hard for me to participate in team sports. I would have liked to go see some Mexican culture like we did last year when we saw Chichen Itza. Learning about culture is interesting to me but the best thing about vacation is spending time with my family playing. 

 Minigolf

 Carlos' Birthday

Lots of great food!

Copyright 2018 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.

Regulating My Body

I sometimes have problems with regulating my body. Regulating means keeping my body calm and able to function. Getting dysregulated is most stressful. I get dysregulated easily. I am dysregulated by my senses.  My eyes see lots of details. I get so very many pictures in my mind. My ears hear sounds all in one volume. Loud. My sense of touch is messed up. I am too sensitive with some touches. When I have to go to the dentist I have anxiety because my senses become heightened. I have a hard time with people having to touch me to cut my nails or hair. I have a hard time with people touching my teeth or examining my body at the doctor’s. I feel like I am being tortured in the same way some people are tortured by tickling. I lose my ability to act rationally because it feels like I will die of fear. The senses of taste and smell do not bother me as much.

Proprioception is my biggest problem. My body does not feel where it is in space. I make many movements I don’t want to make but I am compelled to do it so I can feel my body. I must tap or twirl something in my hands to feel them. I often rock or pace to feel my core. Independent motor planning of my body is difficult for these reasons. Making my body obey new motor commands is practically impossible without outside support of a trusted helper like my mom.  I need someone to prompt me to stay on task and make sure I do it. I need someone to redirect me from stims and things I do automatically. The things I do to regulate my senses are the same things I need prompting from to communicate and move in a goal-directed manner. I am meaning to improve with sensory integration so I can become more independent too.

I am making improvements on my own as I get older. I have learned to endure noise better. I can go into auditoriums for concerts and shows. I wanted to be able to come to my siblings’ concerts, games, and meets.  I challenged myself to make it through even though I felt uncomfortable. I had to make myself feel the echoes, energy from the crowd, and fast moving sights. I found out I could get used to it. I am glad I can now attend many events without too many problems. I can now tell myself to remain calm. Many times I can do it but not all the time. 

Making improvements in self-regulation is one of my goals in the New Year. I hope to try working with an OT to find ways to get my senses working more properly so they help me be more independent and easy going.

Copyright 2017 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.

Happy Thanksgiving 2017

This year I am thankful for many things. I started high school at North. I have been challenged academically and as a person learning to be accepted in the world with a disability. I am thankful I am able to rise to the challenge with many people's help. My school is awesome. They believe in me and want me to succeed. Day to day I want to try my best. A good school brings out my best. I love my school. Mr. L is really encouraging. He begins the day with good talks. I have been learning to read independently and take tests at the computer. I am thankful for my aides at school. Mrs. S and Miss R help me take part in school. I would not be able to participate without them. My aides are very good at motivating me to do my best and do more independently.

I am really getting better at many things. I can sit through classes, church, and performances without being disruptive. I can handle many more situations. I am brave about new things now. I went to my Homecoming and had fun. I think I have been able to do more because I have been given many opportunities to try new things. I also have so many caring people in my life.

I am thankful for my family. I am thankful for my mom. She is always pushing me out of my comfort zone. I love her for it because she helps me not waste my life. She goes beyond what most moms do by helping me be an advocate for change and acceptance of people with disabilities. I am meaningfully living my life.  I am thankful for my dad. He takes me out to do fun things. He also supports our family. I am thankful for my brother Carlos and sisters Ana and Lia. They make life fun. I am thankful for Lola and Lolo and my Aunt Kit, Uncle Mike, Tommy, and Roger. I am thankful for Grams and Dumpa. I have the best family. They make my life happy. I am very loved and blessed.

Happy Thanksgiving! 

Copyright 2017 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.