I am a shy advocate. Being around people that I don’t know well is hard for me. I have social anxiety because I cannot talk or control my body well. I am dependent on my mom or aide to assist me for everything. I am very aware of how different I am from people around me. Autism is very isolating this way.
I am an advocate mostly through my writing. I don’t have to be face to face to speak for others. I am more comfortable speaking through my writing. No one has to wait while I type one letter at a time. I don’t worry my autistic behaviors will embarrass me in front of others. That’s why blogging and Facebook are so important to me.
Recently I have stepped out of my comfort zone to advocate in person. These opportunities have come by request of others to speak at conferences or at more informal settings. Making myself do these talks has been good for helping people. Seeing people like me type shows I am for real. It gives people hope that even a person with lots of challenges can communicate alternatively.
I still have a hard time with public speaking. Sometimes my anxiety gets the best of me and I have fight or flight reactions. I hate when this happens. As much as I want to get myself to cooperate, I can’t. Fear and anxiety are my biggest problems, but the more I face the fears I want to overcome, the more I will be able to handle them better.
I am proud of myself for being able to present at a couple of autism conferences. I did not make a fool of myself. I actually did pretty well. I was able to overcome my fear somehow. Making myself try to speak on behalf of others so they can have a chance for a better life makes me bolder. I will do my best to help others in any way I can. My autism hinders me in many ways but it also makes me an advocate other autistics can relate to. I am going to keep rising to the challenges and do my best.
Presenting at my first conference, Motormorphosis 2018
With my fellow presenters Lisa and Grant
Meeting my mentor/friend and keynote speaker Samuel
In California for the first time Oct 2019- meeting Samuel and Dillan
Getting ready for the Spectrum of Opportunity Conference in California with Rhema
Co-presenting with Rhema and Henry
With Edlyn Peña, our leader and book editor
Book signing (Communication Alternatives in Autism)
Interacting with new friends and conference goers
Speaking to local college students with Reagan
Hey Philip,
ReplyDeleteIt's awesome that you're blogging and being able to express your thoughts this way. I wish more people experiencing varying levels of autism had the ability to do even this as opposed to not being to express anything at all. I stumbled upon one of your earlier posts regarding using writing as a form of communication due to the inability to with the non-verbalness, and it really made me think about what others want to express but cannot in any way, how they're viewed when they're trying to say something but cant. It hurts as my little brother is non-verbal and also not as high-functioning.
Continue spreading the awareness, man. You'll bring hope and inspiration to some, if not more people by the end of it all and your knowledge and experience will definitely help others get through their own hardships.
Keep rockin, brother.
Hi friend, thanks for sharing your story with us. I'm the father of a non-verbal 6 year old autistic child. Your writing skills are excellent and are inspiring to us. We wonder all the time if our child will speak, write or communicate one day. I appreciated how you expressed your difficulties but were able to overcome them to communicate complex ideas. Best to you!
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