My Movement

By Philip

I am wanting a chance to explain my movement as a result of my autism and partial apraxia.  I understand I am quite an annoyance at times.  People have a hard time being patient when I run away or seem like I was ignoring them.  I am always listening even when moving.  I can be trying to sit and work.  I am trying to do my best.  People have a task for me but I can't make myself sit to do it without getting up from my seat a lot. I am trying to control my impulses to run from a difficulty.  Difficult things are concentrating hard to each day meet people's expectations and not easily being able to.  I tear apart being unable to succeed so I flee.  I really need to be understood to feel more comfortable and at ease.  Then I am more able to stay still.  It also helps when I am used to a situation.  I can calm myself.  I am more able to do this now that I can communicate. 

I also have difficulty feeling my body in space.  I move to try to not feel like disappearing.  Perhaps I reach for objects to tap to dot my place in my environment.  I piece together lots of stimuli to find my place in space.  I am kind of like an alien built for a different planet.  I am instead trying to make this world my home by adapting as much as I can to the rest of mankind.