Living With Purpose

A Reader writes:

Hi Philip,

I am writing to you because today I was just with my 11 year old grandson who was visibly so upset and then everything came out: he has no friends, crying because he hates school and already worried about the next year when he just go out. He makes statements like he doesn't know why he is alive and then when he gets upset is mad at himself for getting upset then says he doesn't like himself. I am heart broken and wondering if you ever have these feelings. I'm so upset as I write you I am in tears.  My heart aches for him and I always just try and listen.  Please if you could write me back and let me know how you feel at times.  Thank you.

To ___,

I have had feelings like your grandson too. You are a good grandmother to write for advice. He should know he is loved no matter how he feels. I have made peace with my autism by living with purpose. Day to day I teach people about autism in my writing. Your grandson can find his mission too. God makes a plan for every person. He saves our lives to be used for good. Can he make his interests become his mission? I make use of my autism. That is why I am happy as I am.

Love,

Philip

Dear Friend

A Letter to Philip:

Hi Philip, 

When I read your last post "I belong" I wish so much there was a way you could tell my son, who is about to turn six, to hang in there. We've just started RPM and it's really hard for him, as ultimately I KNOW he wants to talk, emotionally he is very angry, even though we see him spelling and having great success with RPM. We have him working more on literacy lessons with the RPM, but he has really no means for functional communication. He refuses to use his ipad app, or picture cards, or even his more gestural ways of communicating recently to tell us what he wants for the day to day. Instead, he's hitting, throwing things, trying to bite us, headbutting...I wonder if you have any advice for us and him. We feel as though we're finally on the right path but it's so hard to support him when he's so angry and clearly suffering. Thank you for any advice!

Warmly,

Joni

Dear Friend,

I know how you feel. I was in your place before. I am telling you to never give up. I am still healing from my wounds. Pain from being talked about negatively and being treated like a pet to train still aches. I want you to know that you can make a difference in your life. Try to be forgiving to people who have hurt you. Learn as much as you can. Practice communicating through rpm daily.

Peace to my soul was being able to express my wants, needs, and ideas. When people finally listened, bad feelings began to soften and go away. It didn’t happen all at once. It took a long time to get good at ordering my thoughts. I still need time away for making my thoughts organized. I am peaceful now that I am communicating well.

At school I am treated as smart and capable. My teachers compliment me. Each day I love my day at school. I have courage now to meet more challenges. I encourage you to work hard to make regular education possible. I think education steers autistics in the direction we need to go to make our lives more happy and meaningful.

Peace,

Philip

Copyright 2016 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.

Peace

I am more at peace lately. Peace in my life is letting go of my worries and making God center of my life. Making autism center is not helpful. Man should never be the center. Perfect wisdom comes from God alone. Peace comes from really teaching me about God. My mom reads me the Bible everyday. I learn that God is at work teaching people about His great love. He loves us without ceasing. I am peaceful knowing God accepts me no matter what. Mom accepts me like God does. She loves me as I am right now. This is why I can start to feel my anxiety fade away.

I make more daring decisions now. I used to be afraid of almost everything. I feared a beach with its crashing waves and many people. Now I love playing in the sand and sea. I used to have meltdowns in a noisy auditorium. I feared I would make a terrible scene. Making a scene was a bigger fear than the actual noise.

I have developed some calming strategies. One is to pray. Handing over my worries to God really helps. Wanting to please my teachers has made me not behave as badly as in the past. Naturally I am unable to control my movements and stims well. But now I am able to be in control a little more. I am more able to be calmer in new situations. I am not so fearful of making mistakes. I know I will still be loved by God and by those who see me not as a bad boy but as the real me and still accepts me. I am more courageous. I am facing fears of failure by day to day understanding I will be ok even if I fail. God always loves me.

Philip learning to skate at SABAH

Copyright 2015 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.

Peace From God

Everyday I listen to God's word. My mom reads me the Bible every morning. She reads from Lia's birthday present Jesus Calling. I really like it. Peace comes from putting into practice God's word by believing what He says. I look to God when I am momentarily anxious. He tells awesome promises that I will never walk alone. I am really comforted by answers pertaining to His love that never ends. The Master of the universe God attaches Christ to your soul if you believe. I mean to tell others this good news. When you believe in Christ, Satan has no power in your life. The best solution to anxiety is Jesus in your life. Peace be with you. 

Love, Philip

Copyright 2015 Philip Reyes.  All rights reserved.